Wednesday, July 04, 2007

I Know What Happens to Harry Potter

Ok, there's a lot of buzz going on about the upcoming Harry Potter book. And not so surprisingly, there are quite a few individuals who claims to know what happens in the book. And there are quite a few versions of the book out there in the wild. If you are someone who are unlucky (actually, lucky) enough not to get your hands on one of these fakes (my, they actually wrote complete books, fake or not), here's my version. Er.. actually a couple of versions.

l33t v3rs10n:

I hacked as fast I could into the Bloomsbury server (or whoever it was) just now. I used several advanced out of this world hacks and kicked the hell out of their server defense systems. And being one of the l33t (a Scr1pt K1dd13) it was nothing for me. So just hacked into their poor box and managed my way to their 3D display of the filesystem. From there on, it was just a few clicks away to navigate and get to their fileserver. I got to the file "HP_Deathly_Hallows.pdf" and downloaded it to my box. Then I replaced the original one with a file containing the "Sw0rdPh1sh wuz here!!!" text in bright red point 45 text. Then I got the hell outta there to enlighten you lay ppl with the new Potter story. So here's it.

While Ron and Hermione are fighting a deadly battle with the dark lords minions, Harry is confronted with the dark lord himself. Although he puts a valiant battle with him, it looks like the dark lord is about to over power the boy wizard. In a cruel irony of life and in that fateful minute Ginny comes to the aid. She saves her love but falls at last and dies on Harrys arms :-( Or was it Ginny kicking dark lords a**, um... I'm confused. Whatever it was, I once again proved I'm da l33t sup4 HaXXor. You better bow down to me.

Lay version:

I was chatting on Yahoo (gosh, I hate even to fake using Yahoo! mail) in this nice literature chatroom. There was this nice lady (identity withheld due to privacy reasons) from USA. We were having this mutual intelligent chat about British writers when I popped the name Rowling. She claimed "Oh, my god!" (it was O,mg!) "u also a potter
fan, I mean a Potter fan?". I said yes and asked why, casually. One thing lead to another and then to another. To make a long story short, that was when she told me how her neighbour bought a dog from an old couple whose daughter didn't have a child, so adopted a Tasmanian devil from a welsh locksmith who happened to be the friend of a friend of a person who was distantly related to a person who knew someone working in the HR department of Bloomsbury!

Wow! She told me very secretly (we had switched to private chat by then) how Neville dies protecting Harry and Ginny and how Luna becomes a professor at Hogwarts later. She was kind enough to tell me that Ron and Hermione marries and Harry has two children with Ginny. There were other yummy details which I'd withhold because I don't want to be such a spoiler. And please don't tell anyone about these things because it might jeopardize my friends situation.


I just can't believe I wrote all those. Well, I did and you might want to know why. Top reason is I'm sick of people forwarding fake books and jamming my e mail, and trying to show off saying "I got the leaked Harry Potter book, if you want I can give it to you. Don't give it to anybody else..... etc." Said that I'm not irritated, just amused.

Funniest thing with these Potter things was, when a self-claimed hacker (cracker) posted
a mail claiming about the ending of the book, apparently by hacking (more precisely, cracking) into a publishers system. This story was posted in (yes, the Nmap site) and was covered by popular media such as Reuters, BBC, NY Times, FOX News, MSNBC, Boston Globe and several others more. Fyodor (founder and maintainer of Nmap, and claimed jokingly "Muggles take over Insecure.Org!" on homepage. Now, don't you go there and add more traffic! :)

Well, that's it. But given the nature of the subject at hand I'd like to post a disclaimer.
(Whatever included in this post, is just imaginary and for pure amusement. Nothing in this is related to 'Harry Potter' titles, movies or non whatsoever. I have no relationship with J.K. Rowling or her publishers or anyone or anything associated with 'Harry Potter' material. If you think this is in violation of any legal aspects, please stop reading. It will work.)


  1. I don't wanna belive in a gosib... I'll read the book and find the end.. I'm sure it's going to be a tough time to both HP and Voldi..

  2. Thanks for your comments.

    This post was just intended for good humor.

    But from other feedback I got, I learned that some have not read the whole thing and lost the whole point.

    I'm not giving out any Potter spoiler or I'm not another guy caught in fakes. I just wanted to express the humor I felt in the whole thing about Potter leakage.

  3. Holy shit did you make this up. Good creative thoughts. I mean I know that you have writing skills from old days. But this is well gooood. Bye

  4. Thanks bro.

    Yes, I made it up, just for fun.

    And hey, your Blogger profile is not public. Are you hiding it or is it just you forget to make it public? :) Anyway, hope to see you soon.

    BTW, I'm on Debian Etch now. Fedora 7 crashed, and I got Debian NetInstall..... :) yes, I did. I'll put the things in another blog post. Fglrx is working fine and games like Nexuiz, Sauerbraten and the rest are running smooth. :)

    And... oh, Ruby programming is cool. :)